Another day, another post. My mind is blank right now, but is it because there’s nothing to think or too much to think about? Unpacking my mind is the main purpose for my freewriting. Well, I think that’s why this website is ultimately useful to me above all else. It could all just end up being a waste of time in the end, but really, what isn’t?

At least with this “waste of time” I get to give voice to my own sentiments. Even if it ends up being a net loss, I think I’ll still be grateful for being able to interact with my own thoughts. Most of the time, I’m not even aware of my own thoughts. They are usually drowned out by everything else.


What does that mean though, getting drowned out by everything else? It means that there is always some sort of other stimuli that is able to divert my attention. Something is always capturing my attention, and it’s gotten to the point where having actual downtime seems like a rarity.

Introspection and contemplation are actually perishable skills I think. It just seems like either I don’t have the time to self-reflect or I simply will not or cannot. Of course however, this could all simply be a temporary degeneration as a result of conforming to military standards. Perhaps once I have recovered my autonomy, I will recover everything else that has degenerated.


That’s definitely sad. I struggled for around half a minute attempting to remember the word “autonomy.” I suppose that’s an unfortunate irony regarding the fact that I currently have none and have clearly suffered for it. I wonder what it will take to move past this asides from recovering my autonomy.

But it is all fine. Creating posts like these is quite cathartic for me. I have created an outlet to express my thoughts. Writing like this kind of stimulates or forces self-reflection. And as I continue writing out my incoherent thoughts, I slowly regain my liberty. That’s what matters in the end, isn’t it? As long as I can continue expressing my sentiments, then all is fine.

Regards From Your Fellow Wonderer,

Andrew Stargazer

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